Sometimes a lesson is hard – like learning to breathe underwater!
I feel blessed. I’ve had a relatively comfortable life so far. Not too rich, not too poor, always just enough of what I really needed. No hardships or obstacles that I haven’t been able to overcome . . . eventually. And sometimes, in spite of myself.
You see, life lessons do not always come easy for me. I can have a hard head (some might call it a stubborn streak) at times. When I think I know something is right and firmly believe in it, it can be very hard to change.
But as it turns out, this bit of willful behavior can be sort of a gift. Valuable lessons and personal growth come from these learning opportunities because they present themselves again and again . . . until you finally get it.
Here are 3 lessons that have been lightbulb moments for me:
Lesson #1
What I want may not be what I need.
Wanting things to be different than they are only leads to stress, frustration and unhappiness. No matter how much I may want things to be a certain way, whatever happens is the way it’s SUPPOSED to be. And things really do seem to turn out for the best in the long run.
Bottom line: Acceptance is central to finding inner peace and tranquility. Accepting, rather than resisting, makes life easier.
Lesson #2
Be still and you’ll get to know your real power.
My husband lovingly accuses me of having a touch of attention deficit disorder. I have a hard time sitting still – let alone in complete silence. But moments of quiet stillness have helped me to connect with my authentic self, to appreciate and nurture myself.
Bottom line: Be still and you will discover an amazing source of positive energy and an unwavering zeal deep inside of you.
Lesson #3
Just because I think something is true doesn’t make it true.
Thoughts are so powerful. They always seems so real and accurate. Once they get ingrained, they can even become the foundation of our whole belief system. It’s easy to see how what we think can inevitably lead to misunderstandings, arguments and even wars.
Bottom line: Be open to fresh and different perspectives. Don’t believe everything you think!
It’s not that I deliberately choose not to grow from my mistakes. And I’m sure you don’t either. But sometimes we just can’t see the forest for the trees, so to speak. Or maybe I should say the ocean for the waves. So don’t feel bad if you haven’t learned these lessons yet.
And don’t think that because I’ve shared these lessons with you that I have everything all figured out myself. Far from it! I’m still a work in progress – just like you. That’s what life is for – gradually evolving into our true self.
My ongoing practice of trying to live with An Island Perspective is teaching me one lesson after another, every day! And I admit it – some of these experiences are lessons I don’t really want to learn.
But for these opportunities, I am eternally grateful!
What valuable lessons have you learned so far in life?
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About Renee
I love all that you have said! Telling the truth, confessing how you get in your own way, trying to appreciate life as it is, and looking for the lessons available is all such wise advice. Love, love, love this!! Thanks for being honest and real.
And thank you, Elise, for your kind words! While life is easier when we try to live in an open and authentic way, we insist on sabotaging our progress at times. At least I do! Maybe by being mindful of the lessons we’re learning along the way, we can appreciate the natural ebbs and flows as valuable gifts.
I love this post!! (as I do all of your posts). You have such lovely and simplistic prose, that I find revealing and poignant.
Resiliency, and just plain scrappiness, have always been my go-to attributes to get me through less-than-desirable times in my life. My life lesson is, no matter how far you fall, or whatever your disappointing situations may be, Never Give Up. Simple as that… It’s never easy, but we can always rebuild—stronger and better each time.
What great traits – resiliency and scrappiness! No wonder you’ve learned that no matter how far you fall, never give up. Tomorrow is always a new day, a fresh start. That’s such a hopeful outlook, Heidi, and a positive mindset too. Thank you so much for inspiring us with your life lesson.
Love this post!
Funny how when I fail to learn the lesson it just shows up in a much more magnified form – sometimes I guess I need louder messages than others.
Not only are these great lessons, but if we can embrace these as beliefs and practices we might actually learn some of the lessons life has to teach us without needing the proverbial 2×4 of circumstances to finally get the message!
Yes, Susan, I’m all for avoiding that 2 X 4 over the head! While it can take some of us a while to “get” it, lessons learned can really turn into blessings. Instead of dreading these experiences, we can look at them as part of the wonderful adventure of life. These “gifts” lead us to what’s really important, a deeper and more meaningful life.
Renee, I love this post! It seems there are lessons for us to learn everyday if we are willing to open our hearts. For me when something makes me uncomfortable I often ask myself, ‘What might be the message (or lesson) in this for me?’ And, I must admit, sometimes I’m just not ready or open to receiving the lesson … yet. Some of my biggest lessons have been about acceptance of the present moment and discovering that the answers are within me.
I’m the same way Rena! Sometimes I’m aware there’s a valuable growth opportunity nestled within a challenge. But I don’t really want to deal with it so I just try to ignore it. The subtle lesson that starts out as a little feather turns into a smack later on. But you’re right, if we can open our hearts and pay attention, those lessons don’t have to be painful.
I have learned that there is no grey area for honesty and truth. For example, I’ve taught my kids by example that if you find a $20 bill, it isn’t okay to “just keep it.” One time we found one in a movie store and gave it to the clerk in case someone asked about it. Chances were low, sure, but low is not the same as impossible. Another time I found one in our fitness room and gave it to the boss. She said if no-one claimed it, she’d put it in the equipment budget.
Another “grey” area – getting undercharged at a store or being given too much change. I’ve always said that my soul isn’t for sale for a few dollars (not sure about millions!). I have to live with myself.
If being less than 100% honest would “sear the soul” it isn’t worth it (exceptions made for politeness, but that doesn’t sear the soul).
This is wonderful, Renee! I’m always amazed at how open and honest you are, while at the same time, gently sharing a helpful message with us. The lessons that you mention are critical for us to learn if we ever hope to be peaceful. As you said, though, they can be easier said than done. Every day is a new day, and a new opportunity that the Universe gives us to learn and grow. Thank Heaven for the many chances we get to get it right!
Alexandra, genuine honesty can be hard to come by these days. Bless you for being a shining role model AND teaching your kids how to live in truth. Thanks for sharing your insight!
Linda, finding tranquility is a daily exercise. And you’re right! Life gives us plenty of opportunities to practice. Appreciate your comment!
Hey Renee, you have done it again. You have such a wonderful way of saying what I know to be true, yet am not able to put into words. I especially like point #3, about being open to new perspectives and not to believe everything you think. Ha! That one takes some work for so many of us, including me. Thanks again…
#1 What I want may not be what I need.
That’s the one I try to use as my guide. Getting frustrated trying to make anything go exactly the way I want it to…never works. Accepting what I have no control over works much better. And your right, in the long run…it’s usually better it happened the way it did!
Number 3 is especially hard for me but I’m working on it!
Lisa and Deb, #3 is hard for me too! My thoughts just seem so right. Which leads to arguments with people who don’t agree with those “right” thoughts. LOL But it’s not about being perfect with all these lessons. It’s like my mom used to say, when you know better, you can do better. We know that our thoughts can lead us astray. So sometimes we can call their bluff!
Genny, #1 is a tough one too. We want what we want when we want it, by golly! But accepting what is sure reduces our self-inflicted stress. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment!
Renee, I could not agree more. Beautifully said. And we are all artists of our own masterpieces! May this life bring you many blessings.
-Jenna